Hello again, Döner Fans. Many of you have written in to ask for more information about me, the one and only Dr Döner. Your flattery touches me. Some of the most frequently asked questions concern where exactly I earned my PhD in so-called Döner Studies, and whether or not there are indeed any establishments that offer such a niche and unlikely academic qualification. The answer to both these questions is yes. I present to you: Kebab Academy.
I’m not going to pretend it was easy. Three gruelling years studying under some of the best French masters in rotisserie cuisine certainly help put your life into perspective. But I emerged from the kitchens of the Kebab Academy a changed man. A better man. A greater man.
A glance at the class timetable will elucidate the intricacy of such a challenging course of study. Classes were divided between core subjects on Döner Theory and a great deal of practical experience-gathering. Visiting professors from Turkey would hold lectures on all topics pertaining to the art of the kebab, and of course many kebabs were also eaten as field work.
I hope this has answered some of your questions. I invite any sceptics to visit the Kebab Academy website, where proof can be found that this fabled place does in fact exist. Bye for now, Döner Fans!