Kebab Theft Sends Shockwaves Through Europe

Drunken louts make off with Mr Rashid’s kebab

Disturbing news, döner fans. Forget the Eurozone crisis: something of even more monstrous proportions took place in the early hours of Friday 15th June – something which has since sent shockwaves through the world of the kebab. Between 1am and 2am on Friday night, two thieves broke into Mr Azher Rashid’s Kebab Mahal restaurant on Dalkeith High Street near Edinburgh and made off with 70lb of frozen döner meat. A number of other meat-related delicacies were also pilfered. While the Daily Mail and the Mirror featured this heart-breaking story, many of the UK’s supposedly more respectable newspapers failed to give this heinous crime the attention it deserves. It is left to bloggers such as myself to highlight the seriousness of this event, and to dispel any notions that this theft is in any way amusing. Our thoughts are with Mr Rashid at this difficult time.

Frozen logs of kebab meat similar to that taken by thieves

Karma was evidently in play that night however, as one of the thieves got his comeuppance when he dropped the frozen log of döner meat on his foot. Upon viewing CCTV footage of the burglary, Mr Rashid cast doubt on the thieves’ intelligence, noting that they had ignored the till, which was full of cash, as well as the expensive computer equipment which had also been present in the same room. They had, it seems, been intent solely on purloining Mr Rashid’s döner meat. In truth we have all felt similar urges, döner fans, when the need for a kebab grows overwhelming – but we must keep these desires in check! Such crimes cannot be tolerated in the döner community. The suspects made off into the Scottish night with their ill-gotten gains, and have yet to be identified. Mr Rashid was distressed to recount that the pillar of döner meat would however quickly defrost, and without means to cook it the criminals had probably dumped it somewhere. It is yet to be found. This is Dr Döner, urging you to stay vigilant against any similar criminal activity in your area.

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Images sourced from The Daily Record and

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